A simple linguistic trick can help you create distance between yourself and your thoughts, and make difficult thoughts a lot more bearable.
Creating space from our thoughts
It is very easy to have a thought and to start believing that you are that thought, and to begin living your life through it — rather than recognizing that there is a space between the thought and the self that is having the thought.
There is a concept in cognitive behavioral therapy where you take the thought that you’re having and add two simple phrases to it to give yourself space between yourself and the thought.
For example, you may have the thought “I hate my boss.” You will begin to live that thought as a reality, that you truly hate your boss.
Instead, you can add the phrase, “I’m having the thought that I hate my boss.” With this, you acknowledge that you, the self, are having the thought.
You can distance yourself further from this thought by adding, “I’m noticing that I’m having the thought that I hate my boss.”
With these simple phrases, “I’m having the thought that…” and “I’m noticing that…” you can give yourself the emotional space to work with thoughts that are especially difficult or challenging. It acknowledges that there is a self that has these thoughts, which is different than living through these thoughts as if everything you think is true or that you must follow a thought because you have it.
This strategy can be helpful for even the most challenging thoughts of self-hatred or suicidal ideation. It pushes your thoughts just a little bit further from you, makes them a little bit less sharp, and more into something you can examine and determine whether that thought is helpful for you.
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The content here is for informational purposes and should not be relied upon for medical decisions. For the details of your specific medical conditions and treatments consult your doctors or other qualified healthcare professionals.
